Mom deserved better...
Yesterday, I received my copy of the December newsletter for the Blind Children's Fund. I was looking forward to reading it, since I had not gotten it in a while.
The first article was a tribute to my Mom, the founder of the Blind Children's Fund. I saw that it had been written by my sister-in-law Karla and hoped that it would portray adequately the greatness of Mom's life.
This is maybe going to sound like a rant. And, at this point, I don't care who reads this.
TO me, the writing Karla had written was inadequate, stilted, and a trifle sad. The reason? Mom, my brother Bob and his wife Karla stopped speaking in 2001. For six years, my Mom and my oldest brother and his wife have chosen not to forgive each other for what had happened between them, something I don't want to know.
Mom deserved better from Karla and Bob, and they deserved beter from her. Everyone concerned should have heard the words "I forgive you" and should have been able to move on. But, they didn't, and the sad thing is they never will now, now that Mom is gone!!!
I am so grateful that I was able to forgive Mom for what she had done to me. I think that may be why it is I can write so eloquently about her, if I may say so myself. The words while good from Karla lacked emotion, meaning, love.
Is that how I want my legacy to be? Do I want to have someone write a tribute to me and have it mean something? Or do I want a pile of crap for people to remember me by? I hope it's the former.
The first article was a tribute to my Mom, the founder of the Blind Children's Fund. I saw that it had been written by my sister-in-law Karla and hoped that it would portray adequately the greatness of Mom's life.
This is maybe going to sound like a rant. And, at this point, I don't care who reads this.
TO me, the writing Karla had written was inadequate, stilted, and a trifle sad. The reason? Mom, my brother Bob and his wife Karla stopped speaking in 2001. For six years, my Mom and my oldest brother and his wife have chosen not to forgive each other for what had happened between them, something I don't want to know.
Mom deserved better from Karla and Bob, and they deserved beter from her. Everyone concerned should have heard the words "I forgive you" and should have been able to move on. But, they didn't, and the sad thing is they never will now, now that Mom is gone!!!
I am so grateful that I was able to forgive Mom for what she had done to me. I think that may be why it is I can write so eloquently about her, if I may say so myself. The words while good from Karla lacked emotion, meaning, love.
Is that how I want my legacy to be? Do I want to have someone write a tribute to me and have it mean something? Or do I want a pile of crap for people to remember me by? I hope it's the former.
posted by Healing Song @ 8:24 PM
2 Comments:
At February 29, 2008 at 1:25 PM ,
Ryan said...
I agree with you.
It's sad also when someone rights a tribute to another whom they don't really know.
What she should have done was get other peoples input on things.
At March 1, 2008 at 5:23 AM ,
Healing Song said...
The thing is Ryan, Karla did know Mom. She had worked for Mom, before taking over the organization. They had been friends for as long as Bob had been with Karla up to that point. She did at least include a couple of Email tributes, (one of which really didn't make sense to me). But, her own words portrayed the hurt and frustration both she and my brother had with her. One has to school their words in situations like that, so that others won't be able to pick up on that.
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